KOOL DEFINITIONS

KOOL DEFINITIONS:

 

 School:

A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

 

Life Insurance:

A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

 

Nurse:  

A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

 

Marriage:  

     It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

 

Tears:  

       The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

 

Lecture:  

      An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer

to the notes of the students

without passing through 'the minds of either'.

 

Conference:

    The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

 

Compromise:  

   The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

 

Dictionary:

    A place where success comes before work.

 

Conference Room:

A place where everybody talks,

nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

 

Father:

A banker provided by nature.

 

Criminal:

      A guy no different from the rest....

except that he got caught.

 

Boss:    

        Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

 

Politician:

    One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence thereafter.

 

Classic:  

      Books, which people praise, but do not read.

 

Office:  

      A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

 

Yawn:  

          The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

 

Etc.:  

        A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

 

Committee:  

Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

 

Experience:

    The name men give to their mistakes.

 

Atom Bomb:  

An invention to end all inventions.

 

Philosopher:  

  A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.